Thursday, April 03, 2008

What Diego is Really Teaching Your Preschooler

If you watch Noggin as relentlessly as we do then you are familiar with the screen that appears before each episode, describing all the developmentally appropriate "skills" your preschooler is gaining from the program. Hey, it's like preschool on TV. Well when Dave & fam recently came to visit we parked the kids in front of Diego one evening and, to our disgust (and also great enjoyment) we adults proceeded to jointly repudiate what Diego was claiming to enhance in such innocent minds, which is:And we came up with our own list of what Diego actually teaches our children. Before you attempt to refute us, watch a few refresher episodes, there is nothing to argue. It's too bad I am not clever with photoshop - that would have really made this a good post - but for the fun of it anyway, here you go:

GO, DIEGO, GO!
Enhances preschoolers'
MISUNDERSTANDING of NATURAL LAWS
such as the PASSAGE OF TIME,
BASIC PHYSICS, GRAVITY,
and PREDATOR/PREY RELATIONSHIPS

As well as their awareness of
WILD ANIMALS' complete inability to SURVIVE in their natural habitat without
HUMAN INTERVENTION

and the use of
UNREALISTIC and MAGICAL TOOLS that have nothing to do with ACTUAL TECHNOLOGY,
while WANDERING AROUND in the WILDERNESS and INTERACTING with WILD ANIMALS
without adult supervision.


We had some more good stuff too but it didn't all fit in the format. I like a bunch of other Noggin shows like Little Bear and Blue's Clues but Diego just drives me crazy, it's one thing after another on there. You know it's bad when you look forward to the Bobo Brothers' appearance for a little relief. Dave and I wish another annoyed parent with time on their hands would do a scene-by-scene analysis of each episode because there's just so much, it would be a hoot, but I haven't been able to find anything*. In the meantime, we'll just have to continue to entertain each other with our own cleverness.

*Just to check I actually came across this disturbing blog with one of the URL's I tried, but didn't find anything relevant to what I was looking for.

8 comments:

Mia said...

Diego drives me crazy too. I just can't stand it. I think you put into words all the lame-o things about it. Seriously, a camera that can find a palm sized injured animal ANYWHERE in the jungle. And carrying an anaconda, just what I want my kids to try next time we are in the amazon. Ugh. I like Arthur on PBS. Zo likes Higglytown Heros (which kind of drives me crazy) and Reed LOVES Yo Gabba Gabba (which really weirds me out). Yep, I spend way too much time watching kids shows.

dave said...

Ooh, that picture of the screen turned out pretty well! Nice work mocking the format, too.

Kelsey Carreon said...

We are Diego haters as well. I am pretty fed up with Dora also. We are Kai Lan fans for now but it pretty much seems like a Chinese version of Dora and Diego. Nothing surpassed the Doodlebops though. I went so far as to block it. I agree with Mia that Yo Gabba is just plain weird. Luckily Christina would rather watch Superman or Batman ...she is obsessed!

Jenifuz said...

I am stuck with only PBS shows so thankfully my boys aren't into Diego. They like Arthur and Dragon Tales. Not that Dragon tales is much better but oh well!

-Sydney- said...

Hear, hear! George was really stuck on Diego for a while, but his new love is "Between the Lions," which is a little old for him, but it's kind of fun to hear a 3-year old sings songs about "silent e" and "long vowels." It's good for impressing strangers.

But Lions in a Library, c'mon, that's not very safe.

tona said...

This post is hilarious and I haven't even seen one episode of Diego. We're out of the preschool TV phase which I thought would never end. Don't get me started on the tween and teen shows on Nickelodeon and Disney Channel...

Geary said...

Ah, Kari. You really make me feel that all the time spent in our home ridiculing tv commercials was actually worth it. How I miss all of us sitting around the table and having wonderful conversations during dinner. How pleased I am that you have all grown up with such razor sharp minds!

Anonymous said...

We watched a Diego yesterday that had a song about how a jaguar and a duck make silly friends. Absurd on so many levels. Really.

-Erin

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