After hundreds of therapy phone sessions with my mom, a more recent mind-expanding conversation with Maren, and a series of confusing-then-enlightening parenting experiences, I have realized, to my astonishment, the greatest fallacy of parenthood. While I spend some more time pondering it in order for a proper essay, you get to guess what it is (no cheating, Maren.)
Monday, August 27, 2007
The Great Parenthood Fallacy
After hundreds of therapy phone sessions with my mom, a more recent mind-expanding conversation with Maren, and a series of confusing-then-enlightening parenting experiences, I have realized, to my astonishment, the greatest fallacy of parenthood. While I spend some more time pondering it in order for a proper essay, you get to guess what it is (no cheating, Maren.)
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5 comments:
Well if the picture is a hint - I would guess that the biggest parent fallacy is that the books tell you that there is always a reason for tantrums or crying and if you can just communicate and figure out what that is - problem solved. I know that I don't have kids but they are people like the rest of us. Some times I just cry or I am grouchy for no reason at all. Its just that way some times.
Wow this question gave me so much to think about I stayed up half the night... or maybe it was the 3 Diet Dr. Peppers I had with dinner. I think there are a lot of fallacies with parenthood. But for me I think the biggest one is that there can be equality among siblings. Aside from the basic needs of food, clothing, shelter, ect. their needs are completely different. The goal in my mind is fairness. My daughter needs more face to face conversation time than my son. My son needs way more time to snuggle and be held. Since their needs are different I treat them differently but hopefully fairly.
Related to jenny's -
A big one that I had going in was the idea (fallacy, really) that anytime the kid is upset, they actually know why and its just a process of discovery to know what they perceive to be wrong in a given situation. And that once they can talk, that discovery will be easier. Wrong on both counts. So yeah, what Jenny said.
The greatest fallacy of parenting:
your efforts will someday be proportionally appreciated.
my guess is the fallacy is that parenting is easy and that no one else ever yells at their kids; no one else ever feels like they're going to have a nervous breakdown while trying to get their kids to bed; all the other parents are coping really well; everyone else is perfectly happy being the primary caretaker 24-7 and not working outside the home, despite the fact they have university degrees and terrific work experience under their pre-kids belts... is it any of these? (can you tell this topic has been on my mind?)
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