Wednesday, January 05, 2011

Email to Ed

(I really did send this to him. After 10 years, I'm giving up subtle entirely.)

Dear Mr. Hickman,

This is to remind you that your wife's birthday is 28 days, or 4 weeks, away. She has maintained, updated, and prioritized an extensive wish list that you may take advantage of. Know that items rated "highest" are most wanted, "high" are also much wanted. Some items are noted as "4-for-3" which means if you order any 4 of them, you get the least expensive free. Amazon is known for quick shipping but you should order birthday items at least 1 1/2 weeks ahead of time to be certain. Your wife also loves chocolate and has spelled out her ideal gift box in this blog post, which also includes the link to order it.

It is recommended that you set yourself a reminder for January 21 or 22, which is about a week and a half before her birthday, to do some thinking and shopping. Please flag this email for quick reference. Furthermore, know that any items obtained in exchange for the Christmas gifts you said you would return count as Christmas gifts, not birthday or Mother's Day gifts. Your timely attention to that issue is greatly appreciated.

Finally, Valentine's Day is a mere 12 days after your wife's birthday. It is a time to ponder and express your love for each other. Some of the gifts on her wish list may do that better than others. Flowers and well-thought-out acts of kindness are also good ideas on that day. January 31 is a good day to start thinking about Valentine's Day. It is common to not think about February dates while still in January, so another Blackberry reminder is recommended.

Thank you for your attention to these crucial matters.

Sincerely,
K. Hickman
Hickman Family Administrator

5 comments:

Scott and Jen Driggs said...

I love it! I've reached a point too in which it is better to actually say what I need or want rather than hoping and wishing that Scott will read my mind. Makes for much happier birthdays and holidays!!

Mia said...

I love you for A LOT of reasons. But this just puts you even higher on my list! Brilliant. Since my birthday is a few days before yours I might have to send a very similar version to my hubby! You have such a cool wish list.

Jeni said...

I totally love it!!! though sometimes I think I need an e-mail to remind me of other events and wish lists! Oh well!

Heather M. said...

WIsh I'd done that this year. Hubby with a broken leg who doesn't know how to shop online=no xmas gifts from him, though the daughter tried to make up for it by a quick target run xmas eve and hiding from me until checked out. It also probably equals nothing tomorrow, my bday. Shoulda thought of this sooner. Waiting to hear how it turns out for you! :)

Lindsay said...

You are hilarious!

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